My husband and I take turns visiting my daughter, except for twice a week when we bring all the kids. There isn't much to do in a hospital room for 4 hours, so we limit the younger children's time there.
Zoralei is not allowed to sit on her bed at all except for night-time sleep. So she is sprawled on the floor or sitting in a chair or on the couch every time we come over. The place is beginning to look like her room at home with her stuff spread all over the place. They don't seem to mind that it looks so unkept, but I know it is hard on her not to just be able to relax after a grueling workout and it can be difficult to get comfortable in the other seating arrangements given. It has something to do with her not hiding under her covers in a fetal position. I guess other kids did that. I tend to rest after a long workout at the gym and if I hurt, I lay down so we are training her to ignore the normal compulsion to do so. Given my husband is sick, the bed provides a nice place for him since it is not in use.
Zoralei said she had a self-directed workout today. They tell her what to do and then watch from the sidelines to see if she is willing to work hard enough on her own. They also gave her exercises to do on Saturday and Sunday (once on Saturday and twice on Sunday) that are not much different from her workouts with the staff members. That did take up an hour of our possible visiting time, so we went from 4 1/2 to 3 hours today to visit.
Overall, my husband reported she was tired, worried about a more grueling workout next week, but for the most part, he felt she was handling it well.
The friend she met the other day was going home on a weekend pass and so they had lunch together and now Zoralei will not see her for nearly 48 hours. We will visit for six hours tomorrow, but she will have a lot of alone time. It will be interesting to see how she fares. She sent home an order for chocolate:)
She has a lot of time to pass, so she has been writing more. Zoralei has an amazing gift with words and with so much time on her hands, they encourage her to find something productive to fill it. I appreciate that she has chosen to write and not to just browse the internet, play video games, or watch tv, all which they provided in her room. She lost some motivation to write last year when she missed three months of school from the pain of endometriosis and appendicitis, so I love that she is taking time to do so. Much of what she writes, whether it is her medical autobiography, the romance novel based on her friend, or her blog that has a lot of spiritual insights is healing for her spiritually too. It is also an emotional outlet as well as a way to help her stay connected to her friends. The program stresses coping techniques, but I have not seen much encouragement from the staff during the visiting hours to make sure Zoralei is doing something productive with her time and so I am grateful that my daughter is investing in coping strategies to distract herself from the pain. I know popping a movie in is a lot less work. Perhaps this will be one of the benefits of the program. I think tomorrow I will ask more about what they teach regarding coping strategies and what made her write again.
It is important to know that from the hours of 5 to 9 pm, the nursing staff shows up to express a change of shift and to offer a drink and then we do not see anyone until 9 pm, when they ask if she has bathed, tell her they are getting her the sleeping pill, and basically tell her its bedtime. It is not a typical hospital stay where the staff is very attentive. The reality is they do not come around much at all and it is one of the first things they tell you too.
One thing I have absolutely loved about the teens on her floor, they got together and did a bible study for a boy with short term memory issues from an accident, taking turns praying for him, for all of them. They are relying as much on God as they are themselves to get through. I met several teenagers who all found their strength in the Lord during this time. Even though they are all there for different reasons, they seem to have a fundamental understanding that the trauma each of them experienced is overwhelming to overcome without a spiritual connectedness. Those that seem to exhibit the most positive attitude are those who outwardly express their faith and believe in the Savior and attribute his strength to get them through their healing processes. The program focuses on the mind and body, but the teenagers understand the other part that needs healing is the soul.
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